The Mother: The Embarrassing State Of Netflix’s Action Output

Summary

The Mother, played by Jennifer Lopez, formed a bond with a child she gave away years ago and now needs to save her.

This film was just embarrassing. It was embracing for Jennifer Lopez as try as she might she just doesn’t have the presence to be a believable action hero. I know that the straight to DVD action market is a lucrative thing, with the likes of Ruby Rose getting several nice but small paydays throughout the year for a few sleepwalked performances, but unlike Rose Lopez just isn’t believable in the role at all. They could have maybe helped her along by developing the character out into being unconventional in some way or maybe even having her as a hacker, though I question if Lopez would have fit that role either, but having her as an assassin is laughable.

It is embarrassing for Netflix that this is the quality of action film they are putting out, again very much like something that in the previous decade would have gone straight to DVD and sold at a rock bottom price. When you look at the quality of studio action films with the likes of John Wick then this film looks even more like no one cared enough to make it good or more importantly look good. Then when you further compare it to international action films like The Raid then this film looks appallingly bad.

Netflix as a studio, needs to find their niche of films and stick to it as action clearly isn’t for them, they are throwing away masses of money on films like this, The Grey Man, Extraction and so on and all of them can never get anywhere even remotely above average on their best days.

Overall, a waste of time.

1/5

Pros.

I’m struggling but it wasn’t offensive so I can’t give it less.

Cons.

Lopez is miscast

The action is awful

It is generic

It has pacing issues

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Paradise PD, Was A Man Killing Cats Ever Funny?

Written by Luke Barnes

I want to use this piece to talk about the latest season of Paradise PD and the idea of mean spirited humour.

I want to open this up by saying humour is totally subjective so what works or doesn’t work for me might work or not work for you, I am not saying my opinions on what is and isn’t funny are definitive this is simply an opinion piece.

Recently I sat down to watch the most recent season of Paradise PD on Netflix after having watched all of the previous seasons, however, unlike with those seasons I was barely able to make it more than one episode into the new season.

Now why was that? Well though the show has always had mean humour in a similar vein to something like Family Guy and I found with this most recent season that all the characters are just so unlikeable and hateable that I find it hard to watch. There is no reason to watch something when you hate every single one of the characters, is there?

Worse yet in a lot of the cases I find that the characters are hateful for no other reason than to be edgy. That complaint has been levelled against this show since day one and for the most part I ignored it, but now it is too much to ignore, this show is edgy for the sake of it and rather than be cool as the creators probably want it to be it just feels try hardy. Look at a recent adult animation like Little Demon it had a lot of gross out gags and edgy humour but it also had an engaging story, deeper themes and characters you didn’t hate. It didn’t have the character living in the anus of an inbred baby for a joke.

I don’t know dear reader, I don’t know whether this season is any worse than the last few but I do know that it was finally the time wherein I saw the worse side of this show and stopped watching. Maybe I have changed or maybe it is simply the fact that watching a man kill cats and then do a musical number with them isn’t funny.

Hopefully Netflix cancels this show soon.

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The Ridiculous Six: Not Even Trying To Hide The Racism

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Adam Sandler plays a Native American.

Yikes. There was a time when I considered myself a Sandler die hard, I watched all of his films and thought he could do no wrong, then came Jack and Jill and his move to Netflix.

This film feels like it is trying to be edgy, not because the film thinks it is funny, or to own the libs or any other whiney platitude, but rather as a last gasp, as these old timers know that if they aren’t making gross out jokes and objectifying women then people might realise they are wasted up and not funny anymore. Many people can already see that.

I won’t rant at you about the meanspirited nature of this film, or the racial lines it crosses, and believe me this film could easily be labelled racist, but I will say that it is sad to see Sandler and co relegated to this. To me it screams of a group of guys who have given up on themselves and their careers and have realised that their heyday is long since over. It is sad.

I can’t see why anyone would find this film funny, it is just pathetic. It makes even the worst most lazy jokes on current year Family Guy look like comedy masterstrokes, it is just bad. However, maybe that is the point, maybe Sandler and co are just trying to ride the gravy train until they hit forgotten relic status. Sandler at least can save himself with some of the more dramatic work he is doing recently, but some of these guys like Anti-Vaxx ranter Rob Schneider are done.

Overall, Netflix never did get the memo on quality over quantity.

1/5

Pros.

It makes for a good way to entertain your pets when you have to go out for a bit.

Cons.

It is deeply not funny

It is sad to see Sandler reduced so low

It is quite creepy at times, and also racist

It is pathetic in more ways than one

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We Have A Ghost: David Harbour Is Charming Even When Silent

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A family moves into a house only to find it haunted.

I thought in some respects this was quite a sweet film. Very familiar, but sweet. I thought the friendship between Jahi Winston’s Kevin and David Harbour’s Ernest was fairly nice and heart-warming, I liked a lot of the awkward comedy they injected into the interactions between the two, especially after they go on the run. Likewise I thought that the relationship between Kevin and his father, played by Anthony Mackie, was also quite well done I liked how they showed the distance but also that the spark of their bond was still partially alive.

My criticism of this film would be that it leaves a lot on the table and doesn’t go as wild as I would have liked it to, for a film that has a secret government agency that hunts down ghosts this film is more interested in it’s characters relationships than anything else, which for me seemed like a missed opportunity. When looking at Landon’s other recent work with the Happy Death Day films and Freaky I was expecting something a little more zany, though maybe he was trying to rebalance the scales with this one.

A final aside before I bring this review to an end, I think that this film is absolutely stolen by Isabella Russo’s Joy, whenever she is on-screen she commands attention and without trying was easily my favourite character of the film, I liked her attitude and general vibe and I also thought she had a lot of the funniest lines in the picture.

Overall, a surprisingly sweet film but one that has been done before, arguably better, and one that doesn’t go as hard or as silly as you would like it to.

3/5

Pros.

Winston, Harbour and Mackie

The character work and relationships

Russo as the scene stealer

Cons.

A little too serious at times for what it is

Pacing issues galore

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Record Of Ragnarok: Season One Overview

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The Gods face off against humanity in one last series of showdowns that will determine the fate of all life as we know it.

Netflix recommended this anime to me one evening and I thought why not, so I gave the first episode a try and honestly I have to say from there on I was hooked.

I think the thing that really intrigues me about this show is the relationship between the Gods and humanity. I think it is interestingly explored over a series of flashbacks across the season which are spliced into the fights, these can at times feel as though they are dragging on especially in some of the more tense fights but at the same time are crucial to establishing the wider world.

I also enjoy the fact that it is a good mix of Gods and different human figures from myths and legends and what not. It is not just the Greek Gods or the Norse but others as well. I thought the fight between Adam, from the Bible, and Zeus was probably the most fascinating of the whole series because of how they played with that relationship between God and man.

The fights themselves are often very entertaining and have a nice amount of gore, I found myself on the edge of my seat more than once as I cheered on the human fighter even though he seemed to face certain death.

Finally, I would say this would make a very good beginners anime for anyone looking to get into the genre, personally I already have quite a lot of experience with anime, with Black Lagoon being my favourite, but for others this is quite a good gateway in.

Overall, another strong original Netflix anime series. Not quite the levels of Way Of The Househusband but few things are.

4/5

Pros.

The fights

The relationship between the Gods and Humanity

The backstory and world

The mixture of tones

Cons.

Some of the flashback sequences can feel a little filler at times

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Your Place Or Mine: If Only This Could Be What Life Was Like, Charmed Doesn’t Begin To Cover It

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Debbie, played by Reese Witherspoon, and Peter, played by Ashton Kutcher, have been friends for multiple decades but are only just now realising that they want to be with each other romantically.

In many senses this is a safe choice, it is a bog standard rom-com, nothing more nothing less. If that is enough for you then great, but don’t go in expecting anything that is going to change the game or be in any way remotely new or fresh.

I thought both Witherspoon and Kutcher brought a level of charm and warmth to their respective roles, but at the same time you would expect that from two such genre pros. In regard to their romantic chemistry on-screen, there were some sparks there and at times I found myself believing it, but it never really came alive and struck me as authentic.

As it is a rom-com we have to ask the age old question of is it sexist? The answer to that is yes, however, it is not the most sexist rom-com I have ever seen. I am of course referring to the fact that Kutcher’s Peter is a fairly well put together chap, if a recovering addict and a bit lonely, whereas Witherspoon’s character is a stereotypical overly involved mum who lives through her kid, Lord knows they can’t break away from genre archetypes and try and give her a more nuanced role. No, no as she is a woman she is stuck in the obsessive mother role, in the end she is seen trying to branch out to new horizons and work in publishing, however, this is with the implication that Kutcher’s Peter helped her calm down and stop worrying so much about her kid. Yikes.

Overall, pretty much exactly what you would expect from a rom-com both for good and for bad.

2.5/5

Pros.

Witherspoon and Kutcher both give good performances and have a little chemistry

It is fairly well paced

It is very watchable

Cons.

It is sexist

It is fairly forgettable and generic

Some of the side characters are barely characters at all

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Mr Harrigan’s Phone: Just What You Needed Some More Apple Product Placement

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A teen, played by Jaeden Martell, communes with his recently deceased billionaire pal, played by Donald Sutherland, through a phone with not so surprising horrifying results.

Lets get one thing perfectly clear at the start of this review, this film is not a horror film. It doesn’t matter how the trailer makes it look, or how Netflix categorises it, it simply isn’t a horror film. There is nothing remotely scary about this film, yes the ghost kills two people that Martell’s character asks him to, that’s it, we never see the ghost, the kills happen fairly off screen, and the film can’t even seem to manage a jump scare. It is silly that this film is being put out there under the horror genre because it really doesn’t belong there, however, on this topic I have a theory as to why this is happening.

I believe that the reason this film is presented as a horror film is because if it was presented as what it is, a coming of age film, then a lot less people would have bothered checking it out, as I imagine the possible audience for coming of age fare is less than horror. Also Netflix needed this film to be a horror so that it would fit its pre Halloween line up. I think the saddest part of it is that this film isn’t even a very good coming of age film, when you compare it to something like Ladybird or The Edge Of Seventeen you see that this film is just the same festering and pungent teen cliches and tropes rewarmed and with a horror label to try and cover the creative rot.

The only good thing I have to say about it is that the few scenes with Donald Sutherland in them are good, Sutherland still has it and he puts everyone else in this film to shame.

Overall, yet another flop for Netflix, when will they ever learn the lessons of quality vs quantity.

1.5/5

Pros.

Donald Sutherland

An interesting premise that is quickly wasted

Cons.

It isn’t a horror film in any sense

As a coming of age film it is lazy and overly familiar

Martell is awful

It is tedious

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You People: Offensive To Almost Everyone Involved, And Those Of Us Who Sit Through It

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A Jewish man, played by Jonah Hill, and an African-American woman, played by Lauren London, begin dating, yet because it is a tiresome rom-com their families have to get in the way.

This film feels so outdated and out of touch, honestly this whole shtick might have worked when it was done in Meet The Parents all those years ago, but nowadays I don’t know anyone who needs to get their significant others parent’s permission to marry, it seems like something that belongs in another century.

Moreover, the heavy handed social commentary which seems to infest almost every line of this film is again outdated, it has nothing new to say and worse yet in some of its points on race the film comes dangerously close to overly simplifying and using generalisations, truly within this film nuance is dead.

The comedy is mostly misses, a lot of the social commentary based jokes don’t land and are so unbearably cringe that they make you want to turn the film off and put anything else on. To further that point, Julia Louise-Dryfus’ whole character is so one note that it makes you want to skip every scene she is in.

The only reason I haven’t given this film 0 is because Eddie Murphy does bring the laughs and does to a limited degree manage to prop this film up. Also Kenya Barris has a great cameo that really made me laugh.

Overall, this film is cringey and out of touch, but that is what happens when privileged Hollywood starts talking about race.

1.5/5

Pros.

Murphy

Barris

Cons.

The social commentary isn’t good and borders on generalisations at times

The comedy is the wrong kind of cringe

It is outdated and has nothing fresh to say

It has major pacing issues

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White Noise: I Had To Check Whether Hitler Studies Was A Real Thing, That Is The State Of The World

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A family cope with the after effects of a toxic chemical leak.

I don’t really know what was going on with this film, there were so many disparate plot elements happening here that meant any kind of meaningful story simply couldn’t be found. One second they will all be in the town shelter talking about the effects of the airborne toxin, and the next they were back in the family home talking about something else entirely. I would say from a narrative point of view this film is all over the place in such a way that it feels hyperactive.

Moreover, as other reviewers have said there is a certain sense of pretentiousness here for sure, the film is clearly made for a certain type of person and that person is someone who is very much the cinephile. I would say to my own enjoyment of the feature that I found myself laughing and was genuinely engrossed in the goings on that I could make out and understand, but there were times when I was laughing at the film, unintentionally so on its part, wherein I was laughing at just how pretentious it was.

The acting is fairly good Adam Driver and Greta Gerwig steal the show, but Don Cheadle does come in with some great moments as well, so I would say it is a toss up between all three. Though If I were forced to pick I would probably pick Gerwig as her scene in which she talks about trading sex for pills is quite moving.

Overall, not quite as good as Baumbach’s efforts with Adam Sandler, but still mostly enjoyable.

3/5

Pros.

Gerwig

Driver and Cheadle

It is fun and even funny at times

Cons.

It is very pretentious in parts

It is trying to do and be too much

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Glass Onion, A Knives Out Mystery: Returning To Excess

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Benoit Blanc, played by Daniel Craig, goes to a private island to investigate a murder yet to come.

Whilst I still think this film is good, it pales in comparison to the first, not hugely, but certainly to a noticeable degree.

The writing is still sharp and the comedy and commentary is still very much on point, I laughed quite a few times during the film and thought that it had a number of insightful points about modern society.

Moreover, the vistas and the locations are still incredible to look at, and the film does present itself as the child of an Agatha Christie book and the excesses of the modern age.

However, outside of the comedy and the beautiful scenery is where the cracks start to immerge, and the hollowness begins to reveal itself more and more. This hollowness can best be seen in the performances, which do greatly lag behind the first film in that the ensemble never really comes together as well as feeling like each actor is playing a cliché or archetype rather than a real person. It feels like a group of actors acting rather than real characters interacting. The weakest member of the cast is probably Jenelle Monae who struggles to emote and gives an incredibly hammy accent turn midway through the film that simply isn’t believable at all, but this is why often musicians don’t make good actors.

Lastly, the runtime is an issue. At the two and a half hour mark the film quickly starts to develop pacing issues in act one and these get worse as the film progresses, there are many needless asides, flashbacks and so forth which whilst interesting to a degree in flushing out the world these characters inhabit, never really need to be.

Overall, still good but in some ways a little disappointing.

3/5

Pros.

The location

The comedy

Craig

Cons

The pacing issues and unsatisfying nature of the ending

The acting is frequently poor

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