American Horror Stories: Bloody Mary

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A group of girls summon Bloody Mary, played by Dominique Jackson.

Whilst this premise is incredibly generic I actually ended up enjoying this episode.

The two main things I think this episode does well is firstly that it is actually scary, and does have a number of good scares peppered in throughout and secondly that by flipping the standard Bloody Mary myth and instead changing it to a title that is past on and that has roots in slavery really opened it up for innovation and a new direction. For once American Horror Stories felt fresh.

However, it is not all roses as none of the performances were very good and the episode was incredibly predictable in terms of plot, you knew straight away where it was going and it basically went there with the only mild twist being that rather than being killed the lead becomes the new Bloody Mary.

Overall, I think American Horror Stories should aim to be like this more, to take chances and fully commit to the horror element of the shows title.

Pros.

A fresh take on an old myth

It has some good scares

The ending

Cons.

It is predictable

The performances

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American Horror Stories: Milkmaids

1/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A town in frontier era America descends into cannibalism.

In my previous review of last weeks episode of American Horror Stories I said that Drive was the worst episode of season two of the show but oh how wrong I was.

So most importantly this is in no way scary. What is scary is how long it goes on for. The various plot threads they have going on in this episode clash so badly together that by the end you are confused at to what you just watched.

The cannibalism feels incredibly forced in, as though they wanted to make an episode about the plight of women and LGBTQI+ characters in the early days of America and then were like ‘oh damn this is supposed to be a horror show, I guess we better put something scary in’, it feels like an afterthought.

Sadly they also bring in Seth Gabel to play the antagonist of the episode, Gabel was fantastic in the TV series Salem and all throughout the episode I couldn’t help but compare the two and it really wasn’t favourable for American Horror Stories. Gabel tries his best here but really isn’t given enough to work with.

Overall, it felt like I was watching some terrible low budget larping production organised by goth teens.

Pros.

It is over quickly

Cons.

Gabel is wasted

The cannibalism feels forced in

The ending

It isn’t remotely scary

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She-Hulk: Superhuman Law

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Jennifer Walters, played by Tatiana Maslany, is fired from her job after getting into a superhuman show down in the courtroom and must now look for other work.

I enjoyed this episode a lot more than the first and thought that it was a noticeable improvement. I thought the comedy landed a lot more and made me laugh a few times and I also like that they are quite clearly setting up the Planet Hulk and World War Hulk comics storylines, as we see Banner, played by Mark Ruffalo leave on a space ship in the episode. I also thought bringing back Tim Roth’s villain character from The Incredible Hulk was a smart move especially because it puts Jen in a morally questionable spot and also develops out the character more beyond just being a mindless evil Hulk creature.

However, this episode still has some noticeable issues. The worst of these is how this episode just moves on from the Titania, played by Jameela Jamil, introduction last week and doesn’t even bother to bring her character up again which gives that final interaction in the first episode an air of pointlessness and I think that whole sequence was a poor fit. Moreover, the lines at the start of the episode in the bar when Jen says how much she doesn’t want to be a superhero and how bad her super hero name is are irritating, worse yet is the line about billionaires and orphans which feels like they are dumping on what has gone before which isn’t a winning strategy.

Overall, certainly better but the writing still needs a lot of work.

Pros.

The humour is starting to land more

World War Hulk

Bringing back Tim Roth

Cons.

The early bar scene

Ignoring Titania

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American Horror Stories: Drive

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A young woman , played by Bella Thorne, believes herself to be the target of a serial killer after she is chased by a manic driver.

This episode was lazy, they rip off the classic urban legend of the murderer in the backseat and think that by calling it out they somehow make up for it, which is simply untrue. I suppose I should give them some credit they do flip it so that the killer is actually the driver and the person in the backseat a victim, but even this feels contrived and lazy.

The story seems to go out of its way to spoil the twist, and when we finally learn that a bored and disinterested Bella Thorne is the murderer we are left going ‘well obviously’ rather than feeling anything even remotely akin to shock.

I would also question in what way this is supposed to be scary, it feels far too tongue in cheek, especially the ending and makes me question whether they even got the brief.

Overall, the worst episode of the second season of American Horror Stories so far.

Pros.

It is watchable

It is unintentionally funny at times

Cons.

Throne

The episode ruins the twist midway in

It isn’t scary

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Top Gun Maverick: Men And Their Feelings

4/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Maverick, played by Tom Cruise, returns to teach the next generation.

That premise sounds generic and lame but actually proves to be quite entertaining. I think by using just the right amount of nostalgia whilst also tying in elements from the first film in an interesting way that felt like it benefited the story and drove things forward rather than just being used for cheap member berry moments.

I think Tom Cruise was good here, though I would not say he was the star of the show as he was upstaged by both Miles Teller, playing the son of Maverick’s old friend Goose, as well as an also returning Val Kilmer. Cruise plays Maverick in much the same way he does all his other action movie characters, see Ethan Hunt or Jack Reacher, so if you like that then you will be entertained, but if you were hoping for something new then you will be disappointed.

Personally, I found this film to be enjoyable and very watchable but I don’t understand why it is so big right now or so critically beloved. Maybe it’s because I didn’t watch the first film as a kid or maybe it’s because I often find Tom Cruise starring in a film to be an off-putting factor, however to me this really was a case of the film being good not great.

Overall, a fun movie but by no means a must see.

Pros.

It is a lot of fun

It uses nostalgia sparingly and well

It is well paced

Teller is terrific

Cons.

Cruise is just playing the same old same old

Jennifer Connelly’s character is a big bunch of sexist cliches

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Only Murders In The Building: I Know Who Did It

2.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The trio reveal who the killer is.

I worried last week that the show would swerve away from having Cinda, played by Tina Fey, be the main villain of the series, and then this episode proved that worry to be founded by having it be her assistant instead. I think this reveal was way less satisfying and felt quite anti-climactic.

Moreover, another thing I didn’t like about this episode, which has also been at the borders of this whole second season more broadly is a sense of smugness. I know the show has been nominated for a number of awards and has quite a devoted fanbase, but the series seems to be a little too into itself now, giving far too many knowing looks to the audience.

I will give the episode some praise for bringing back Cara Delevingne’s character, even if she is still being incredibly under used, I think Delevingne’s new arrival is probably the best thing about what is otherwise a very mixed season.

Overall, a decent end, but one that highlights the shows key issues, it’s long in the tooth continuation onwards, and its smugness.

Pros.

Bringing back Delevingne

It was watchable

A few funny moments

Cons.

The smugness

It ignored the best possible villain

It like the rest of the season was badly paced

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I Love My Dad: Taking Facebook Creeping Up A Notch

2/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

A dad, played by Patton Oswald catfishes his emotionally vulnerable son, played by Jason Morosini, after he blocks him online.

I have two key issues with this film. Firstly, the end of the film shows the son being warm towards the dad and even goes so far as to almost celebrate the dad at the end when in actual fact the dad is cruel, unethical and deeply controlling. This normalisation is not undone by the fact the film points out these issues in the father’s personality as in the end these criticisms don’t matter. Secondly, the film tries to bill itself as the ultimate cringe comedy, but instead just comes off as deeply depressing and leaves you feeling sad.

There are a handful of sparse laughs to be had here, but for the most part this film leaves you cold. Honestly the context of the son’s mental state makes the film uncomfortable viewing, in a different film the father’s catfish could come off as funny or even as a prank but as here he knows his son has suicidal tendencies it just comes across as messed up and wrong.

Overall, not particularly enjoyable.

Pros.

A few laughs to be had

It is mercifully short

Cons.

The father doesn’t deserve to be redeemed at the end

It is not as deep as it thinks it is

It makes for uncomfortable viewing

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Day Shift: Ruining A Perfectly Nice Pair Of Pants

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

Jamie Foxx is a vampire hunter and Dave Franco is a man who consistently ruins his slacks.

For the most part I enjoyed this film. I think tongue in cheek action is where Netflix really shines, not when they are trying to be serious. The comedy of this film mostly landed for me and I found myself laughing quite a few times. Likewise I was impressed by most of the action sequences, but I would expect nothing less with Chad Stathelski’s hand in producing this film.

The world building here was nice to see, even if it did feel like a plagiarised version of the John Wick set up with the Union being a very obvious stand in for the High Table and or the world of the Continental. It was nice to see the film explore different types of vampires with different powers and abilities as it gave the various enemies some nice variety.

I think in terms of performance Jamie Foxx is very take him or leave him, he’s fine but anyone could have done his role and many would have done a better job of it. Franco easily upstages his on-screen partner and has a number of memorable lines. However, I think the scene stealer of the film is Natasha Liu Bordizzo’s Heather as she brings a real presence to the film and also has great chemistry with both Foxx and Franco.

Overall, a moderately entertaining picture.

Pros.

Franco

Bordizzo

The action

Cons.

It feels a little too similar to John Wick

Foxx is a miscast lead

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Only Murders In The Building Sparring Partners

3/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

An old enemy rears their head as the gang home in on a murderer.

So I think this episode was again a mixed bag, for the most part it is filler and padding, however the final twist reveal more than makes up for it. By pointing the finger at Cinda, played by Tina Fey, the show really capitalises on the dislike the audience has for her and creates a satisfying ‘it all makes sense now’ sort of moment. I will say however, that if the show doesn’t go with Fey’s character being the villain of this season then it will feel like a huge missed opportunity.

Again the Oliver, played by Martin Short, parenting subplot continues to not even remotely interest me, as we all know the secret will come out it is just inevitable. I think some of the side stories this season has done has expanded and deepened the character of a lot of our favourite Arconia residents however, in other cases such as this it has just ended up feeling like filler.

I liked that Cara Delevingne’s character returned and that it looks like she won’t be the villain, hopefully in the next episode we can have her origins explored a bit more so that her character can start to feel less two dimensional.

Overall, a fairly standard episode made a lot better by a great and satisfying twist ending.

Pros.

The ending

Delevingne’s return

The sparing sequence

Cons.

The Oliver parentage side story

The pace is really quite off

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Only Murders In The Building: Hello Darkness

3.5/5

Written by Luke Barnes

Summary

The trio must race back to the Arconia in order to save Lucy, played by Zoe Colletti, who faces down a killer in a blackout.

I was right the prospect of a blackout did lead to interesting things. I think the idea of Lucy genuinely being in danger of dying and the sort of ticking clock narrative of all that really helped to bring me back on board for this episode and to care again. I thought this episode often nailed the tension it was going for and had genuinely worried for the characters.

I also really enjoyed the Nina, played by Christine Ko, side story in which she chats to the buildings doorman, played by Teddy Coluca, during the blackout. I thought it was nice to see a more human side to Nina as parts of this season have set her up as some what of a cold character or even a possible future antagonist. I thought the scene the two shared was sweet and it brought a smile to my face.

However, nothing can ever be without flaw. I didn’t like the Oliver, played by Martin Short, subplot wherein he questions his son’s parentage. It felt almost soap opera esque and entirely needless, I would have rather the series be shorter and we don’t have to get overly indulgent filler like that.

Overall, certainly a lot better than the last few episodes but not without its issues.

Pros.

The tension

How the episode uses the blackout

The scenes with Nina

It makes you care about the characters

Cons.

The Oliver subplot

It feels like the ending of the season should be closer than it is

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